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As psychiatrists, we often become so involved with taking care of other people that we forget about the individuals in our lives who mean the most. Whether we are married with children or have a significant other or close friends, most of us have a family that means a great deal to us.
As an early career psychiatrist, I find it challenging to balance building my career with having a strong marriage and raising my children. Sometimes it seems as though there is just not enough time in the day to do everything for everyone. It is not surprising that by the time the end of the day has come, I have spent more time supporting and caring for other people's families than my own. In fact, I am the first to admit that although I love being a psychiatrist, to me family must come first.
I have always felt it important to be involved in APA and to draw attention to issues pertinent to members who are just beginning their psychiatry careers. However, being involved in a national organization also takes its toll on the family. APA and other organizational activities require a great deal of traveling and being away on weekends, a time I often try to reserve for my family. Although my family has always been supportive of my involvement in these activities, I know it has required them to make sacrifices.
As psychiatrists and APA members, we must be sensitive to the lives that we have outside of our careers and professional organizations and put our families first.
I have been grateful for the way that many members in APA have been sensitive to the issue of having families and still trying to remain involved with the organization. There are a few individuals who have gone out of their way to make my family feel part of this organization.
One of my goals has been to take my family on some business trips so that we can spend time together. This often means, however, that I am in meetings while the rest of my family is touring or sitting in a hotel room. Although everyone works hard when attending an APA meeting, APA leaders have often been sensitive enough to set aside time to allow meeting participants to be with their families or have set up organized activities in which families can participate.
Dr. Louis Moench, a member of my Area Council, always comes running up to both my wife and me when we attend APA functions and makes my wife feel welcome and important. He always remembers that our spouses have their own lives and interests, which are just as important to them as psychiatry is to us, and thus asks my wife about what she is doing in her own career.
Another example that comes to mind was when Dr. Jack McIntyre sat next to my wife and me at an Area Council dinner to which spouses and significant others were invited. We were impressed that the then president of APA was kind enough to sit next to a then resident and his spouse. We were even more impressed when he thoughtfully followed up with a kind note in the mail a few days later telling us how much he had enjoyed spending the evening with us.
As you can see, I love my family but have also grown to appreciate deeply the friendships that I have made during the short time I have so far devoted to serving in APA. The fact is that I could continue to come up with a number of other examples in which my colleagues in APA have understood that family comes first.
The lesson here is that not only should each of us remember what means most to us in life, we also need to remember that the way we treat each other's spouses, significant others, and family members is extremely important.
Dr. Johnson is in private practice in Tucson, Ariz., and is on the faculty of the psychiatry department at the University of Arizona.